My Vision Boards (Part 2)

Creativity has always been a passion of mine. Every time I go to rehab, my greatest inspiration to move forward comes from the random art projects we create. I always feel kind of awkward when I create projects in rehab because nobody gets into it like I do.

My Vision Boards

I created these vision boards in rehab. I’m the only person here who creates vision boards.

Caseload (Poem)

Oh what a caseload

Recovery, recovery all around
But not enough to sink

Into the minds of the slaves
holding onto the ways
that make them sink

Childhood Addict Behavior (Journal Entry)

I been jonesing for sweets since I got sober. Much like in active addiction, I keep telling myself all day I’m not going to indulge in my bedtime snack. But you know how that goes…

Growing up in Spanish Harlem

Welp… I did it. I went to rehab. Now I’m living in sober housing in Spanish Harlem. I’ll write more about it one of these days. I been  been attending a lot of groups so I don’t have much time.

Murder One (Poem)

Dedicated to my sister in recovery, Jay… About face my representative
Don’t try my murder one

Going Back to Rehab

I moved back to NYC from CT a year ago. I wanted to go to rehab when I first came back but it wasn’t in the cards. My brain has been running on empty for years now and I can’t take it anymore. Something’s gotta give.

Step One: Dicking around with my thumb up my butt (Twelve Steps)

The thumb is a symbol of great power. It represents a vital step in the evolution of man. The anus symbolizes repression, feelings of shame and self-esteem issues. And dicks? Well, I’ll let the reader decide the meaning of that vernacular.

Anyhoo, I’ve been doing a lot of dicking around with my thumb up my but lately. Indulging in pity parties, self-loathing, whining, complaining about everyone and everything, harping on what this one or that one did to me. Basically throwing my hard earned tools of recovery into the fire. 

Letter to Rehab Donors

The following is a letter I wrote for a newsletter at the sober living house where I am residing…

Step One: The Pink Cloud (Twelve Steps)

Last time I got sober I went through the Pink Cloud Syndrome, which lasted for ten months and ended in broken windows and a trip to the psych ward followed by a devastating relapse. At the time I was unaware of the pink cloud. I didn’t find out about the pink cloud until 1 1/2 years later when I entered rehab.