The Disease (Poem)

You were my friend from the deep end
Shelter from my own bull
The lighter side of darkness that I couldn’t see was not light enough

You took me further than I wanted to go
when I said I wanted to stop
And when we got there
you kept me longer than I could stay
And played me nonstop

And when I wanted to go
You tried to stop me from leaving 
Fed every lie that you cooked

You told me I was all wrong
I had nothing to give
No point to writing my book

You were so indestructible
I lost my voice
I had no strength to tell you FUCK OFF

I lost so much of me
How could I try to help me?
The only thing that could save me was God